Or in this case, the High Line.
Can I really go one post without a pun? Nope, didn’t think so.
I recently walked the High Line in Manhattan with a dear, dear friend of mine. Following this was a girls night filled with wine, sushi, and rom coms. Needless to say, it was a killer afternoon.
And it got me thinking {as most great afternoons do}.
I have changed a lot over the last few years. Like, a lot.
It hasn’t always been for the better, but most of the time a mistake or lapse in judgment is just that. And I learn from it.
I used to be the kind of person that refused to let someone get away with an injustice. I would argue with professors in school if they belittled me, get revenge on ex-boyfriends, and hold a grudge against a friend for their lack of follow-through when it came to making plans. Maybe it was the legal student in me, demanding a punishment of some kind, maybe it’s Maybelline.
Either way, it was exhausting.
I focused so much negative energy on other people, that I wasted the opportunities to better my own life. All the while thinking I was protecting myself. Because we know it all at 19, right? Wrong.
I’m 26 and I still haven’t fully figured it out.
And therefore, I shouldn’t expect anyone else to have it all together either.
I’m taking my ‘healthy self, heal thy self’ attitude seriously this year. But it doesn’t mean I haven’t slipped back into unhealthy lifestyle choices {aka multiple happy hours, zero sleep, and too many microwavable burritos}. I don’t always say the right things, or I share too much information than necessary. I am a hypocrite. And I didn’t shower this morning. I’m human.
And so is everyone else.
I have bad days.
And so does everyone else.
It’s exhausting to hold on to bad energy, revenge plots, and grudges. And although deemed necessary at times, I need to stop complaining to my wine bottle, and instead face the things that are not always easiest to tackle.
I am taking the high road {or line for all intents and purposes} people.
Firstly, I want to forgive. Which, admittedly, is the strip of pavement with the most potholes on the high road. It’s not an enjoyable experience, until you reach the end and can appreciate the smooth road ahead. Forgiveness is important. It allows you to let go of something, or someone, releasing the negativity that may be built up inside. But it’s hard. Trust me, I know. It’s something I am still trying to master. If forgiveness were a language, I would be about 11% fluent.
All I know is when I do forgive, I feel relieved. Like a weight has been lifted from my shoulders. It’s just unnecessary to hold a grudge these days. There are so many beautiful things to live for in this world.
Now, forgiving should not be mistaken for forgetting. If you were truly hurt by someone, or something, that should not be ignored or pushed to the side. By all means, cut ties. Just don’t hold on to it. Let it go. Channel your inner ‘Frozen’. Forgive. Do not allow it to consume you. Then move on.
Easier said than done, Rachel.
I know, I know.
Next, I would like to spread more joy. Which sounds cliche on every level. But hear me out. Everyone feels shitty at some point in their lives. Some more often than not. Some more severely than others. But everyone is dealing with shit.
Shit is subjective.
What a sentence, amirite? That’s some poetic nonsense. {p.s. i’ll be accepting any and all book deals at the end of this rant}.
But who am I to judge, or decide, who deserves sympathy for their shit? Point blank, I can’t.
So instead of comparing my own struggles, trials, and tribulations, I want to choose joy. I want to extend a hand, an arm, a smile. Anything. Because who knows what it may do for someone.
We all know how it feels to be lonely, confused, uncomfortable, different, or just plain sad. Again, we’re still human. The robots haven’t arrived {yet}.
I also know how meaningful it is to accept the openness of another person when I am feeling any of those negative feels.
So, for the days where my shit is under control, I will choose to spread it everywhere {okay, now there is another not-so-poetic sentence for you}. Killing it.
And finally, on my high road, I plan to see the best in people. I quickly lost trust, became bitter, and ultimately refused to find the humanity in people after last year. All because of one person. Well, not entirely one person. But either way, it was unjustified to feel the way I did upon return to America last year.
I could feel myself instantly searching for the downfalls in human beings, before highlighting their positive qualities. And at times, I still continue to distrust individuals before trusting them. We all have our shit, remember?
Recently, I realized how absolutely ridiculous that is. And how incredible human beings can be.
Whether it is a delightful conversation with a stranger on the subway over my most current read, or the man at my local bodega that continues to give me free matches for my candle addiction, or the fact that my boss rocks a rose gold phone case because his wife wanted an upgrade on her own. I see kindness, compassion, and openness all around me.
It’s undeniable.
Therefore I have no choice but to succumb to the positivity. Poor me.
New York has taught me many lessons this year. And these are the ways I choose to move forward in this new life and take the high road… high line. Whatevs, you get it.
Side note: The High Line is not only a place to over-analyze your life, make promises to yourself to become a better person, and make multiple references to shit, but also a great place to spend an afternoon in the sun. Grab a latte and a friend, and walk along the elevated linear park that once used to be a railway line. Just another one of the many gems New York City has to offer.
Have you ever walked the High Line?