An Apology Letter to South Korea

When I am about to leave a place I consider ‘home’, even if only for a short while, I usually write a letter and address it to the city. In the past, I wrote London a love letter, and New York City a letter full of lust. As my time has come to an end here in South Korea, it is only fitting that I continue the tradition.

Dear South Korea,

I must begin this letter by expressing my utmost respect for you. You took a chance on me, and welcomed me into your life without hesitation. While some people looked down on your decision, you didn’t let the opinions of others resonate within you.

And I took full advantage of you.

I knew before arriving, that this would solely benefit me, all the while you would be left out to dry. My ill intentions were simply to use your comfortable position as a base to explore my other options. While you were patiently waiting for me to return to you, I would carelessly sneak away without thinking twice.

You gave me your best, and I brushed it under the rug, believing the grass is greener on the other side. You asked me if I really loved you, and I lied to you. I led you to believe that you were the apple of my eye.

I desperately tried to throw in the towel. I urged you to give me a reason to walk away. But you kept holding on. You kept giving me second, third, and fourth chances. Until, eventually, I gave in to you.

You taught me empathy, compassion, and patience. You tested me on a weekly basis, all the while molding me into a better version of myself. You allowed me to walk around with a chip on my shoulder, patiently waiting for the day I would come to appreciate you. Selflessly, you encouraged me to follow my passions, even if it meant putting you on the back burner.

I never expected to fall in love. But I did.

And by then it was too late. We had made the decision to go our separate ways. While it was an amicable split, I quickly began to question my choice. Was I ready to move on? What if I could stay just a little longer? Would it make a difference? Would we have a real shot at this? Maybe this time I would try harder.

After believing I had selfishly used you for months, I soon realized I had been the fool all along. I saw you embrace the others and I raged with jealousy. They would get to spend more time with you, while I had plans of jumping from country to country. Sleeping in a different bed every night.

I reserved those beds, and now it was time for me to sleep in them. Maybe I’ll look back later on down the road, and come to accept that you were the one that got away. Already, I find myself growing protective of you. When others mention your name in bad faith, I am there to defend you. You may be misunderstood, but at the end of the day, you were there for me when I needed you most.

No one will ever replace you. No one will ever come close. How could they? Our love story is complicated, as many of the best love stories are. Even so, I hope we will remain friends. I hate when people say that. But I truly mean it.